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But wait, there's more.

There's just no polite way to say "Buy me things", is there?

Join codebastards, I dare you. Remember, codebastards are us.

I'm baded and jitter. So are these people. (And why not follow the previous, next, or random links?)

Need a band name?

Doug vs. Japanese Snack Foods: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.

rant is where the heart is

diaryland: entry for 2005-02-14 (13:41)
In which our plucky young hero is the off-centre of the universe.

A chronology of my life:

Birth-1995: I am the salt of the earth, a friendly person with a rich sense of family, community and tradition.

1995-2002: I am the salt of the earth, a friendly person with a rich sense of family, community and tradition.

2002-present: My rude, domineering sneer (should I deign to even glance at the subhuman proles) is just one of the many visible symptoms of my contempt for every other part of the country and my not-so-secret wish to grind all their faces under my left-wing bootheel. I scorn everyone outside the insular and elitist borders of this monocultural, bland, ugly city, which when you get right down to it is neither important nor memorable on a global scale.

Or so I'm told.

If there is any sport more tiresome the Toronto-bashing that you will find everywhere else in Canada people gather, I have yet to find it. I find it remarkable that so many people are able to summarize every neighborhood in the city and its surrounding area, often without even needing to visit.[1].

What makes this really funny is that Toronto is a destination for thousands of Canada's best and brightest (I'm sorry, second-best and almost-brightest; can't forget tall-poppy syndrome). But do not be fooled when these elitists claim to be from Winnipeg, St. John's, or Clarenville, Newfoundland. They are Torontonian, through and through. They have the taint.

I never understood what it was like to be held in contempt when I lived in Nova Scotia. I could not grasp the concept of people thousands of miles away thinking me a filthy alien when I resided in Saskatchewan.

But Toronto, now, Toronto has really been a learning experience. I just wish it had taught me the rest of Canada was a fair and open-minded place.

1. Like, for example, the Nova Scotian man the Star talked to, whose last visit to Toronto confirmed his suspicions that the city is cold and rude. He presumably also added that there are no subways in Toronto, perhaps someday the city would have a major league baseball team, and Eaton's is the largest retailer in the city, considering the visit took place in 1948.

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