rant is where the heart is

diaryland: sirilyan.diaryland.com: entry for 2001-03-28 (02:15:00)
In which our plucky young hero is as political as possible under the circumstances.

If there's anything I love about Canada, it's how picayune we can be when we try.

Okay. This is going to take some explaining.

My country's Parliament, at the moment, does not appear to care about our tax burden, or about our economy or unemployment rate. It is unconcerned with immigration or emigration and scoffs at worries about parliamentary reform.

Instead, every single opposition MP has focused, laser-like, on $245,000 that our riteonrabul Prime Minister, Jean Chretien, made from the sale of shares in a golf course in Shawinigan, Quebec, and the fact that he helped get a bank loan for a hotel next door to the golf course. The opposition claims that he was a part owner of the golf course while he was working on the loan, and that is a conflict of interest. The PM claims he sold the shares long before and demands an apology.

That's the short version, by the way. The long version is long. Very long. Long long long. And even more boring.

Now, I ask you, is this the sort of scandal that a First World nation should engage in? When our neighbors to the south have scandals, they have scandals with a capital scan. The October Surprise. Iran-Contra. Watergate. And, oh yeah, Whitewater.

What do we get? A golf course.

Not only that, but we can't get rid of it.

The opposition has been after Chretien for a long time because there's something about him to irritate every dissatisfied group in the country. The right wing hates him for coopting their agenda, moderating it with a bit of social liberalism, and managing to win three majority governments in a row with it. The left wing hates him for being in the pocket of corporate interests, as opposed to being in the pocket of union interests the way God and nature intended. Quebec separatists hate his hard line on federalism, and Westerners hate that he beat Stockwell Day.

Not that it really matters, since from the past several days (though it feels like months), all the opposition parties have the same agenda, one with only one item on it: goddamn Chretien, we'll get you yet! It isn't a sign of unity, it's a sign of shared desperation.

Will our riteonrabul leader survive this? Of course he will. He's a survivor without compare. He's strangled protesters and laughed at police brutality (keep in mind, I sort of like the guy) and come out of it smelling like a rose. Don't worry about the Little Guy from Shawinigan. Really.

Besides, this is the most entertainment Canadian politics will offer all year. And since we won't get any better than this meager scrap, we might as well sit back and enjoy it.

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