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rant is where the heart is
diaryland:
sirilyan.diaryland.com:
entry for 2004-08-03 (12:38)
In which our plucky young hero saves you twelve bucks.
M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN:
Hi, I'm M. Night SHYAMALAN and this is a movie I'm doing. Everything looks
pretty typical, although dimly-lit and devoid of bright color. La la la,
normal as normal can be.
[M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN's face suddenly falls off, revealing ELECTRONICS.]
M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN:
Ha! I'm actually a robot! Isn't that an exciting plot twist? Aren't you
on the edge of your seat wondering what will happen next?
[M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN dissolves into a mass of some sort of writhing silver things.]
M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN:
Fooled you! I'm actually a hyperintelligent colony of shapeshifting eels from
the moon! Doesn't that knock your socks off? Aren't you at this very moment
looking around the theater asking yourself if anyone else is a colony
of moon eels? Well, look closer!
[The walls of the theatre collapse, revealing a television set.]
M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN:
Because this isn't a theatre at all! This is the set of Charles In
Charge and all this has just been the filming of an unaired episode and
you don't actually exist, you're just a background character! Oh the
crazy!
[The eels that make up M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN form a giant hand to grasp a bag of money and slither toward the stage door.]
M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN:
Well, see ya. I've got to go do cocaine off a hooker's ass.
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