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But wait, there's more.
There's just no polite way to say "Buy me things", is there?
Need a band name?
rant is where the heart is
entry for 2002-01-30 (17:29:00)
In which our plucky young hero bites the hand that phones him.
So, the mail arrived today.
My cable company sent me an entirely useless magazine with poorly-laid-out movie channel listings for the month ("ACTION - 1993 - Wesley Snipes. A federal agent tries to find the men who killed his partner. 1h 32m - A for violence, language") and celebrity factoids that are truly useless even by the degraded scale of utility that apply to celebrity factoids ("Asthon Kutcher has two webbed toes on his right foot"). Looking further, apparently I pay two dollars a month for this magazine, conveniently itemized on my cable bill. I've not once read this thing, not even when I actually do want to watch movies on the premium channels.
The city utility board, meanwhile, sent me this month's electric bill, complete with an utterly unapologetic notice that they are hiking their rates 7% a month for 2002, effective as of the beginning of the year, while various commercial consumers could see as much as a 13% increase. They thank me for my ongoing patronage. (I don't want to live in an unheated hovel with only candles for illumination - good for me!)
And my phone company? They send me three little plastic calling cards good for 90 minutes of absolutely free long distance, no strings attached.
Take two guesses which of these companies I recently abandoned because another long distance provider would save me 55% on my bill. Yes sir, loyalty is my middle name.(Browse: previous or next. Notes: post or read.)
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